Have you ever felt like something is missing from your life but you don’t know what because life already feels complete?

In the months leading up this move, I had contemplated moving back numerous times. I never really understood why. Although I missed my family, it wasn’t enough to trigger a move.

Hey friend, so what do you think happens if you don’t heal your core wound?

Do the gates of hell open and swallow you until you realize that the only hell that exists is the one you consciously (or subconsciously) created for yourself?

Not quite.

You just end up living your personal version of hell, which may not actually be so bad.

It might be occasional arguments with your spouse that you consider a normal part of the relationship.

When you have an abandonment core wound, there’s a deep fear of loss that will underlay anything that requires a commitment from you. Abandonment is the fear that you’ll lose whatever or whoever you commit to, so rather than committing, you’ll have think, “why bother?” You’ll basically stop before you even start.

Generally speaking, an inability to take responsibility stems from a history of suppressing blame, shame, guilt and anger from experiences where you felt out of control, victimized and/or bullied. These often stem in childhood where emotionally unavailable parents tend to cross boundaries (because they can) without taking your personal needs, wants and feelings into account. As a result, you never learn to develop healthy boundaries, but rather learn how to suppress your own needs in order to make your behavior more acceptable and desirable to those around you. You quickly learn what makes others feel comfortable and you adapt your behavior to accommodate their needs above your own.