I've just returned from a necessary social media break, which enabled me to recover from having to hit the re-set button on my life.
Last October, I became engaged. One month later, this relationship ended. What shook me the most was that I never saw it coming, even though I was the one who spent time meditating and coming to the conclusion that this relationship was not going to work. I had a choice to make. One choice would lead me to planning our wedding and the other to unknown territory, with no physical-world security. Fortunately, my unlimited faith in the Divine urged me to walk away and continue seeking that which I know I deserve. When we make choices based on self-worth and unconditional self-love, the rewards we receive in the long term are worth it. It is not easy to do this because it can be really scary! But faith is what bridges the gap.
I spent much of December trying to navigate the holidays and remain as present as possible. I was not only juggling my own emotions during the holidays and visits with friends and family, but I was battling my own mind, which was running rampant with thoughts of "What are people going to think?", "What do I say?" And then I quickly realized that I have a lot of love and support in my life, and that the people closest to me knew exactly what to do and say. I also learned that it is okay to ask for help.
Being a healer doesn't mean that I bypass the human emotions involved with a loss. Just like everyone else, I ventured through the five stages of grief and loss. The only difference is that although the tornado was swirling about my life, I was able to find the center in the eye of the storm.
The first stage of loss is DENIAL, and so I questioned how this could be happening and refused to believe it was. Then when I saw things were not going to change, I moved into the second stage of loss which is ANGER. I was angry at our creator, Archangel Michael, my X, my friends, my family, my guides.....you name it. But most of all, I was angry with myself for "not seeing the signs" that led to our demise. I not only pointed fingers, but I cast judgment (one of the lowest energies in the Universe) on myself. This is a dangerous zone because it is so easy to slip into Victimhood, and that's exactly what I did.
Next up was BARGAINING. The X and I tried to reconcile. We both tried to make changes that didn't feel good to either one of us, so it didn't work. So, I bargained with the Universe, "What can I do to shift this?" They wouldn't indulge me in the slightest bit. They had my back and saw the higher alignment of why this was happening, even when I couldn't.
I slipped into DEPRESSION where I slept for hours on end. Fortunately, my knowledge of complementary healing quickly brought me out. I used a combination of flower essences, meditation, energy-healing work, sleep, sunlight, lots of water, healthy food, and B vitamins. I also honored every single emotion that I experienced during this entire process by letting it flow and go. I consciously surrendered what didn't feel good, instead of holding it in.
Today I am officially "on the other side" in ACCEPTANCE and feeling really great! I realize that there is no "loss" in the Universe. While I may have temporarily felt the sting of the relationship ending, I simultaneously realized that the gaping hole it left would be filled with something equal or better, even if that something is standing firmly on my own, centered in my own energy. That is Universal Law.
The most difficult part of this journey was feeling displaced. Talk about a re-set! After 10+ years of living on my own, I ended up back home with my parents. But I quickly recognized it as an opportunity for me to heal that which was still holding me back from childhood, so it’s all good.
Below are some of the simple steps that I took which enabled the healing process:
MUSIC - I've listed a sampling of my personal favorites that spoke to my soul and assisted me in my healing. ANY song that brings you joy or initiates an emotion is perfect for you at that time, so listen away!
- Need to cry / mourn / release - You're The Inspiration - Chicago.
- Let's us rock out and get out of our "head" - Hurt So Good - John Mellencamp.
- Knowing what we deserve - When I was your man - Bruno Mars.
- Remembering how powerful we are - Fight Song - Rachel Platten.
- Helps us realize that it's all working out in divine timing - You can't hurry love - Phil Collins.
- Reminds us that we are loveable - Just the way you are - Bruno Mars.
- Hope for the future / Great dance song to move energy - Finally - Ce Ce Peniston.
- Hope for the future / Feel good song - Over the Rainbow - Israel Kamakawiwo'ole.
- Feeling better / Coming Out Stronger - I'm Coming Out - Diana Ross.
PRAYER - My most used phrase was "I give up!" The Universe loves when you surrender because it enables them to intervene. I also prayed for intervention, assistance and clarity. I asked the Angels to keep me company and surround me with their wings until I could stand straight again.
SLEEP - I slept for 11 hour stints at a time, as well as 2-3 one-hour naps during the day. I listened to my body and rested as much as I possibly could.
MEDITATE - I chose meditation that consisted of sitting in silence, walking quietly in nature and adult coloring. Do what works for you, but definitely make it a habit.
FOOD - When our emotions get the best of us, we have a tendency to over eat or not eat at all. Remain mindful of how you must support your body during the transition. For me, it was incredibly important to shift back to my normal eating habits, which not only help me balance my weight, but made my body happy as well.
DAVID DEIDA - Spiritual Teacher specializing in Spiritual Growth and Sacred Intimacy. Watching his videos saved me from my own perceptions of relationships and re-set my self-worth meter to the highest caliber. His videos are provocative, enlightening and stimulate food for thought on all levels. Whether you're in a relationship or not... watching his videos are valuable. He has a free video series on YouTube named Spirit Sex Love. Here is the link to video #1.
Obviously, I'm much stronger than I initially realized.
When all of this happened, my way of coping was to yell: "PLOT TWIST!" and move on. But one session with a great healer late in December confirmed a long-held fear that I had, but never personally acknowledged. She said to me, "Felicia, you are really quite resilient. You need to take time to mourn situations in your life. You are very good at picking up and moving on."
It hit home... right in the heart.
I pride myself on having a tough exterior and always moving forward, no matter what has happened. But since this healing, I've taken the time to honor the emotions that I feel and will continue to do so going forward.
The pain of this loss caused me to second guess every part of my own intuition. Archangel Michael has since advised me to stop asking whether someone is or is not the "One" because that is a block in and of itself. When I did this, I placed my personal happiness in the hands of another and that is the opposite of self-empowerment. It's a call for us to be living in the present moment, doing what makes us happy, and enables us to fulfill our passions. The right person will meet us right where we are at.
As 2016 dawned, I decided to step back from my business and from my life. I spent January reviewing, reconnecting, reflecting and refreshing. January was mostly comprised of the first of four Mercury Retrograde cycles, so the timing was perfect. I reconnected with my personal path at a soul level, recovered from burnout, and reviewed my plans for the year. I spent countless hours in nature and in meditation really dialing into my soul level desires.
Early in January, Michael notified me that I'd be signing a lease by the third week in January. After looking online twice and viewing one place in person, I located a gorgeous 2 bedroom, 2 bath within a two-minute walk from everything that I love. The owner didn't return my call at first because he had transposed the numbers. My intuition said to call him again, which I did. When we met in person we hit it off and found common ground in our Greek ethnicity. My lease didn't begin until February 1st, which was outside of the retrograde cycle. Not only did this owner lower my deposit and monthly rent, he also invited me to live in my new place for free for the first 10 days, which meant that I was able to get settled in and buy some new furniture without the added expense of pro-rated rent. I now have my own office, and my best friend, who is also a talented interior designer, is decorating the entire place with me. I have a very clear idea of where my business is headed. It is clearly a time of new beginnings.
I almost didn't share this story for fear of being too vulnerable. But then I realized I needed to share this to let you know that you are not alone during times of transition. In addition, writing this has assisted me in my healing process, and it has allowed me to step forward with more authenticity. Our stories are powerful and necessary to share.
I spent most of 2015 seeking validation outside of myself, which taught me not only trust my intuition, but to self-validate leading me directly to my word / phrase of 2016 which is…...
(I AM) POWERFUL
And so are you!
Many blessings to you all. Thank you for sharing this world, life and network with me. I'm truly blessed to have your support, trust and light in my life.
Feel free to share your own personal story of triumph from a difficult situation in the comments below. I love reading your comments and thoughts!
Felicia Marie Giouzelis
Trained in a variety of complementary techniques including Kinesiology and Quantum Healing Hypnosis Therapy, Felicia is a Master Healer specializing in soul level healing and transformation with the Akashic Records. When not working with her amazing clients, Felicia spends her time whipping up a delicious vegan storm or decorating her new home.
Felicia is currently refining a revolutionary healing technique known only in the times of Atlantis. She is excited to unveil this technique at the healing retreat in Greece. To learn more about the retreat, click here.