Today, I spent most of my day in tears. Tears over friends that came into my life this year and dropped out just as quickly. Tears because I thought we would be friends forever, that we'd be there for each other in the good times and the bad. If I needed them, they'd be around, as I had been for them. Yeah, not so much. As it turns out, when I needed my friends the most these past few months, they were no where to be found. Texts, phone calls, emails and Facebook messages went silent, unless you count the sound of crickets chirping. They are still on my social media accounts but they don't interact with me AT ALL.
I had been there for every single one of these friends when they needed me. I answered questions, gave advice, talked to Angels, helped them clear, accessed the records on their behalf for free and in some cases, stayed up until all hours of the night on the phone to 'be there'. So, where are these friends now that I need them?
Over the past 3 months, I heard 'no thanks' for a $150K grant and at least 10 'friends' dropped out of my life. I've had people call me a fake, a phony and tell me that i'm ripping people off. The sh*t hit the fan so hard this year, there have been days that I didn't even want to be here. And none of the remaining friends or family that heard me talk about any of this even so much as reached out. Not.a.one. So I sat here today, crying and thinking about all of this. Thinking about how i'm all alone and going straight into the dangerous victim-zone... :) I know that what I miss most is having a support system.
So I asked my Angel peeps, "Why am I walking such a lonely path with no support system?" I made it clear to them that I realized I wasn't truly alone as they were always there with me, but I can't exactly meet them for drinks. You know what i'm saying?
That's when I heard, "What others think of you is none of your concern."
I can always count on Archangels Michael and Gabriel to lay the smack down. Then I realized that I AM my support system. I've never needed anyone else to lift me up, I lift myself up. I am independent, self sufficient, driven, motivated, positive and sure of where i'm headed. And you know what?
That drives people freakin' crazy! Why, you ask?
No matter what happens, I refuse to stop, give up or do anything off path. If something isn't working, I immediately move on and try something different. I always keep moving forward.
When people see you shining your light, you trigger the hell out of them. It is like staring straight into the Sun. You either look away or put on sunglasses.
When you shine, your light also shines light on everything that they are not doing with their lives. You make it so abundantly clear that they are not on their path by being on yours, that they have no choice but to step back. It forces them to look at their own lives and see what they could be doing. And this is a beautiful thing. You are helping them grow!
In many cases, they don't even understand how to relate to you any longer. And try to remember, this isn't actually about YOU. And if you think it is, then you have some triggers that you need to work out in your own life. If you are experiencing an unpleasant situation or are attracting things into your life that are less than ideal, it is time to look within. The outside world is simply a mirror for our inner world.
Know that when you try to manifest and ask the Universe for whatever it is you want, you will lose people in your life that are not in alignment with the requests that you have made. Be prepared to receive an upgrade on all levels. The old and worn out must make way for the new to come in. Falling apart means that things are actually falling together in way that will leave you thrilled at the universe's amazing super planning abilities. You are making space for the people that are going to support you, your life, your mission...how amazing!
But it wasn't always like this...This is the first time in over 10 years that I find myself searching for my independence. Back in my early 20s (it wasn't thattttt long ago ;) I would do whatever I wanted, with whomever I damn well pleased, whenever I felt like it. What happened to THAT girl?!
Whenever someone drops out of your life, invoke your inner train conductor... NEXT!
Then invoke your inner pilot light..."Thank you for making space for the divine right friends to come into my life Universe!"
Anyone that is meant to be in your life by Divine Right, you can never lose. And if they were only there temporarily, that's ok too. It means your business with them is done and you're growing into a new set of experiences and people that can and WANT to support you.
Keep going even in the fact of adversity. Even when it looks like you may be on your own little old path, by yourself for the rest of your life, remember the story of the footsteps next to you and remember that God, Universe and Angels are always walking beside you. Remember that when you shine your light, you inspire others to shine theirs! You are giving them the opportunity to witness what is possible in all its glorious beauty.
With Love xoxoxox,
p.s. The more resistance you encounter, the more you are on path. ;)